Life on Autopilot

My little sister is learning how to drive. I’m not sure why they’re letting 8-year-olds get their permits (because my baby sister CANNOT be 15 already) but from the moment I arrived home for Christmas it was a constant begging of “Can we go to Target, or maybe to Albertsons? hmmm, does Mom need any milk for dinner?” Suddenly I was being offered up to run an endless list of errands, all from the passenger seat of my Nissan.

I remember when I first learned how to drive. I was so overwhelmed with everything I had to do - press the gas pedal just the right amount, turn the wheel, check the mirror, and don’t forget your turn signals. Everyone in the car had to stay silent, and if my left elbow itched, it itched until my car was fully into park. Just pulling out of my driveway into my residential neighborhood was a feat worthy of celebration and praise.

Today I left my apartment at 8:08 and suddenly the clock switched to 8:18 and I was pulling into my office - 4 miles away, with my makeup freshly applied, tea half empty in my left hand and email fully checked before I hit the office door. I don't actually remember turning out of my apartment onto the busy 4-lane street, or navigating morning traffic as I passed 3 freeways and the normal morning variety of idiot commute drivers. I just arrived, on auto-pilot, and walked through the door.

Funny how things change in a matter of a few years. Then again, I kinda feel like that's been life for me in general lately. 6-months ago I was completely overwhelmed at the thought of paying bills, maintaining my car, balancing work and life and a boyfriend, all while trying to learn navigating the new LA traffic that had become my life. Everything was an extreme stretch, and waking up at 7 am required conscious planning and effort.

Today I rolled out of bed and hit the shower before I realized my alarm hadn't even gone off. I checked my email and paid the gas bill simultaneously on my iPhone, not giving any thought to the process as I greeted the Fed-Ex guy at the office. Suddenly a life that was exciting and stressful and new has become ... autopilot.